Salita

‘Wag kang mag marunong.
‘Wag mong isiping ayos lang mag sambit ng mga bagay na masasakit
maitaas lamang ang sarili mo.
Hindi mo ba naiisip na napakatalas ng mga salita?
Hindi mo siguro alam na nakapatay ka na.
Marahil ay hindi mo nga alam.
Kung hindi mo nga alam, maaari ba kitang tawaging mangmang?
Manghuhusga, tumigil ka na.
‘Wag ka nang mag-imbita ng karadagdagang kasapi na magdudulot ng giyera.

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Missed

I was hoping to see the double eleven on my screen but saw an 11:12 instead.

Maybe it’s a power trip from the forces reminding me of missed wishes I cannot have.

But I’ll try to fight the forces.

Be

Nobody said you were their sun

Nor their sea

Nor their anything

But you still willingly

be their sun

and their sea

and their everything.

Daydreaming

Well, one day, the butterflies will all fly away
and the stress my stomach feels will be gone.
The sleepless nights will not be because of thinking of you,
and the dreamy mornings will just be for drinking coffee.
The humming birds, will be just birds
and the river of stars will be just stars.
And in the end, the song I’m about to sing will be cut
and now in daydreaming I need to wake up.

The Day You Left, I Killed Shakespeare’s Poetry

The day you left, I killed Shakespeare’s poetry. I almost yelled Wherefore art thou, Romeo!except that your name wasn’t Romeo. I kept looking outside the window waiting for paper aeroplanes filled with secret love letters and songs to knock on my glass window. I kept listening to the hush of the mango tree in front hoping that you would, somehow, climb and tell me once more that Juliet is the sun except that my name wasn’t Juliet. But it won’t happen anymore. Now, birds singing became as annoying as hearing your name even when nobody even mouthed it.

I tried looking for you but you were so hidden in your own enigma. Your whole being were hidden in the deep that I felt embarrassed for the Pacific Ocean and its shallowness. The result of continuously searching for you would be a foregone conclusion that I would never ever find you, not in the near future, not even in the furthest future because I have realized that future wasn’t going to happen for us. How it gave this fragile heart an attack and stopped its beating turning it into flat lines like it was before.

You did not apologize, you only said goodbye through a poem. I tried to get rid of your smell from my memory and so I started sniffing scents of lovely flowers and picture images of angels to replace what you have instilled in my mind. I tried walking the same path covered with dried leaves alone, sitting on the park bench alone, eating vanilla-flavored ice cream alone, and walking home alone to familiarize doing things, of course, alone. Good night, good night. Parting is such sweet sorrow,That I shall say good night till it be morrow. And the night came but it was not a fine day.

I tried forgetting how your eyelashes look like. How it’s like a curtain that when opened gave me a glimpse of the sun through your dark brown eyes. I tried not remembering how your hands are like dancing trees when you play your guitar and that serious look on your face while strumming the strings, it’s the only thing that wrinkles my nose. And I tried forgetting how your voice, it sounded like the waves crashing to the shore – full yet calm.

It wasn’t really your fault. Maybe we were just a pair of star-cross’d lovers who took their life. You disappeared and so I was forced to disappear. Maybe it was your fault. You became in love with love but no one can blame you for that. Maybe it was our fault. We became infatuated with this love and didn’t see that it was only a fool’s paradise. Maybe it was my fault. I don’t know why.

But Maybe, it wasn’t really anyone’s fault. You did not return. Because you did not even leave. And I was just waiting.

charmainesque

Inspired by Thought Catalog’s The Day You Left, I Filled My Chest With Poetry

Here we go again

You got lost in the land of the unknown

Between the black and white fields of imagination

Wandering, lurking, searching for the throne

Of the king of the city of bones

Wasn’t able to find out the known

So you tilted your head and looked to the sun

Still didn’t found the one

You were looking for

What was it that you adore?

Will you dig up to the core

To find out more

Than what you’re searching for?

It got a little bit nonsense

So you put up a fence

Ready for defense

Against the soldiers of the other side

Looking for the bride tied with pride

You tried

To escape

To go to the moon

You let out a tune

And made them swoon

And thought that you’re the sweetest crooner

But they found out sooner

that you’re not the answer

So

Here we go again,

Looking for

The right

Actor.

……………………………………………………………………….

This is just a free-flow writing. I’m not even sure if it made any sense. But I just wanted to write something.

Okay and 68 More Words to Hurt You

Image

He said, “goodbye.”
She said, “okay.”
“I did not even love you.
You were just a hallucination produced by
taking too much love songs.
You were just an imagination crafted in my mind.
We were just actors role playing a perfect fairytale.
Convincing each other about the happy ever after that we’re heading.
But this lie we fed ourselves with was exposed.
This happy ever after crushed us.
Maybe goodbye was our ever after.” She ended.
This was how okay and 68 more words hurt them.

June, alone.

You don’t know how rain feels in June.
How it feels gloomy when gray clouds start to cover the clear skies.
You don’t hear how thunder reacts after lightning passes through the heavens.
You don’t see how the children play in the rain and how happy they are holding each others’ hands while singing and laughing.
You don’t smell the scent of the grass covered with raindrops.
You don’t touch them.
You don’t know.
Because you’re not here.